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D’Krunk /dəkrə́ŋk/ (female)

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Pendula /pɛ́ndʒələ/ (female)


This name hangs in the heavens like a universal constant, swaying ever back and forth as the world spins helplessly below. Do you plan on shaping your daughter into a hyper-reliable clock of a person? If you answered ‘yes,’ this name will meet your needs without sacrificing any beauty to do so. On the other hand, those unwilling to commit to such an intense regime of mental conditioning may want to steer clear. If your child should turn out  unremarkable (meaning, average), it is likely the name will bring up images not of the mathematically perfect arc of a pendulum, but of other things that are known to sway back and forth, for example: the pendulous genitals of a bull or stallion.


“You’ll love her, mom. Her name’s Pendula and she’s from New York City.”

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