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D’Krunk /dəkrə́ŋk/ (female)

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There was a time when the name Klott conjured images of someone’s belligerent grandfather, but ever since the one and only Tom Cruise chose this name for his new baby boy early last month, Klott’s presence in the namescape has seen a massive resurgence. We should all thank Klott Cruise for reminding us that this dusty old moniker still had something to give the world. Blunt, yet elegant, this name...

Ten years ago today, a little name showed up on the scene and changed everything we thought we knew about naming babies. That name was Koppter. With it’s mechanical purity and frenetic pacing, Koppter caught the attention of not just name connoisseurs, but the entire world. Its spare beauty spawned a wave of imitations and homages which eventually came to be known as the Misappropriationist Moveme...

Katelyn was thrown into a mixing bowl with a javelin and a mystery ingredient. They were whisked, floured, kneaded and baked. The resulting loaf is Kaygelin, a name that can melt a heart as easily as fresh-baked bread can melt a pat of butter. What is the mystery ingredient, you ask? Sadly, no one knows — including the name’s creator, who swears it came to her in an ill-remembered fever dream. Per...

This name is clearly a hybrid of the traditionally unpleasant names Kyle and Tyler. If the name were meant for a boy, this fact might be enough to keep most parents away. By defining it as strictly female, however, Kyler’s designers have effectively washed away the foul taste of this regrettable ancestry, allowing the connoisseur to focus on everything else the name has to offer, like the crisp no...

Names don’t get more retro-modern than Koilert. No wonder, then, that it has become incredibly popular amongst children of the 1980s who are now old enough to be having children of their own. Like the coiled wire of a makeshift electromagnet, Koilert exudes an elemental power that isn’t always obvious to the naked eye. With loose ties to Kyle, Doyle and Herbert (or, perhaps, Q*Bert), Koilert has s...

While this no-nonsense spark plug may initially sound like a boy’s name, a few moments of scrutiny inevitably reveal the feminine beauty that lurks just below this name’s cold, industrial surface. It is recommended, during a Klegg’s childhood, to use two-syllable nicknames like ‘Kleggy’ and 'Kleggers’ in order to provide some warmth. This will prevent the child from becoming too soulless. Some par...

Krakfilch is one of those names that shapes a child in its own image, so before you choose this for your baby boy, make sure you’re prepared for them to grow up with rough edges and – quite possibly – a bit of a smell. It isn’t the most pleasant-sounding of names, but these days character and originality tend to be valued over aesthetic beauty, which is the only explanation for this name’s sudden...

Said with the pacing and cadence of ‘barista,’ this brand new name has been blowing up over the past few months. On first glance, its influences seem obvious: Chris, Carrie, Melissa, etc. Over time, however, the name continues to reveal itself. You see new influences here and there. Paris, perhaps, or even Karl. The more you look, the deeper you’ll go, following an intricacy that shrinks off into...

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"Pam is a family name and when I had our little girl, I thought I'd have to settle on Pamela until I heard Pamples. All the convenience of Pam, none of the ugliness of Pamela. It's perfect!"

 

- Darlene, Madison WI

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